Let’s Start Over

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From My Prayer Journal

“You have provided me with so much. I had lost faith and I never understood why things never happened. I felt alone,confused,led down so many empty paths. I have felt jealous, not thankful,blamed others. I had put all this feelings ahead of you. All I cared about was me …
I have layer and layer upon myself of pain, guilt, and ugliness. I am ashamed. I still want to push down those feelings. To hide – disappear. Lord, help me to start bring up all those layers. Let me feel like I am opening up. You are the one and only that can heal me. You are so loving and the More I learn about you – the more I realize what I am meant to be – and what You made me for. I know Jesus is the one with that bandage that gap. Jesus, I pray and want you to know you are first in my heart.

Lord, I can never thank you – I can thank you every minute, second of everyday – and not begin to touch the glory of grace you have for me –

Let me continue to feel you – I know you are here – right now – you move my hands my eyes – Let my eye’s open up more towards You,

Amen “

 

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“Am I messing up my Kids?”
Proverbs 31.org Bible Study

::Memory Verse::

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To Be Loved.. And Never Give Up

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I want to share my testimony .. I sent this letter to my church – and I want to share with everyone. Never give up – God will show up..

THIS JUST HAPPENED TODAY-

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“While you were in your mother’s womb, living and moving and developing. God, like a skilled craftsman, was sculpting you.. “

“God gave you certain personality with certain abilities that would express in a certain way in this world through working a job.”

From Limited Life – Derwin Gray

…God LOVES you .. and you are always will be loved by Him…

::To My Church::

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I want to share this testimony with my River point family. Riverpoint have been praying for me and I have a wonderful report to share. I had major surgery last Sept. and I lost my job. They would not hold it. The doctor’s found a softball size cyst in my uterus and had to do an emergency hysterectomy. It was in a 2 week time period.

I was at my lowest – I lost my new job – had to have surgery – and I had no insurance. My now husband decided to move our wedding date up to Dec. 7. We got married but still struggled.

Since the beginning of the year, I have been looking for jobs but not really looking. I finally gave everything to God and knew he was going to put me where I belonged. I was about to give up.

Last Spring, I was in a facebook group. I saw this post from a lady that was asking about a bible study. I messaged her and invited her to attend. She didn’t know if she could because she had an infant. Luckily Riverpoint had child care. She attended and I ran over to introduce myself. She did not even go to Riverpoint. I just felt I had to get her there. Not only was she blessed by Tayna – we became good friends.

Well, last week – I received a FB message from my friend with a copy of a post on a facebook group asking about anyone being interested in working with a private school for a asst. teacher. I took a leap of faith and emailed her back – I left my contact info have NO idea what was going to come of it.. In the meanwhile – my friend was messaging the lady that posted on fb about me saying I would be perfect for the job. That evening I was talking to 2 middle men. My friend – the facebook lady – she was talking to the owner. ( I know – confusing) but long story short – all time I been praying for God to lead me where I was supposed to go. I had Riverpoint, KSBJ, Proverb31.org, countless facebook groups, and friends praying for God to put me in my place where I could use my gifts.

Funny thing is – I have been getting rejection letters from other jobs.. over and over.. especially the last couple of weeks. Talk about discouraging.

I just now left the school. I was in tears and shaking – I was hired on the spot and actually filled out the paperwork. I am scheduled for Aug. 11th. I get all the teacher holidays off – spring break – weekends off – and a salary that opened up our budget that we were struggling to most with. I just need to attend 3 classes to be certified and learn CPR and First Aid.

My heart always wanted to teach – I never went to college – have no training – but here I am – where God has picked me up – and placed me to show all His glory. He made me with gifts and talents – and I am sitting here in tears and chills … praising and thanking him.  I get to work with Pre-Schooler’s teaching them … putting an impression on their tiny lives..

I really have no other words to say – but to bow my head down to the King .. and praise Him – telling Him… I love Him and I knew He had a plan for me. It just took a little longer than I wanted – about 15 years.

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 Thank you Jesus – …

 My Life Vision:

In my Limitless Life Study – I had to write out a Vision Statement for my Life

“To be strong and faithful with a passion to love others while offering grace”

I am going to use my gifts and talents God gave me. He had handpicked me to place me in my life – He knew while I was in my mom’s womb where He wanted me.. I just had to wait long enough to see that come through.

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Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Fresh Day.. Love Endures Forever.

God is so beautiful. We will never know how beautiful Heaven is going to be. We can have glimpse at times. I have a heart that is FULL of God even when I don’t feel Him sometimes. I have to sit back and just whisper ” I am here, Lord.” Here is a picture I took this morning during my walk. I was sitting near my lake and just praying and worshiping. This is my reminder.

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My prayer walk:

Dear Lord,

I give you such gratitude for all your beauty you created since the beginning of time. You are the maker of everything in life. Your love amazes me and gives me the strength to go on. I do not deserve anything you bless me with. I humbly come down on my knees to praise you. To see your face in the morning sky. It’s a new day, Lord, and I love you.. and I need you… you are my everything .. even when I feel like I am alone.

Amen

{{ Photo Credit: Natasha Scott – author of Blog}}

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Meet Suzy Q.

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One day a baby bird falls out a tree for the very first time. She hits the ground and looks around her surroundings. She is very unfamiliar and it makes her frighten. She feels abandon and alone. She is now an orphan from her family. She has new elements to get use to. She will be learning to trust herself and spread those wings for flight. She has the power of the wind to carry her. She is a new creature and is proud of her accomplishments.

I don’t know about you, but I feel like that little bird. I feel abandon and lost. I look around and see the surrounds are too big for me. How can I put a dent into this world. In ways, my spirit feels abandon. I always think I am able to take on the world. Grab that sword – and charge. Than I hit a wall. I only went a few feet and that wall I wanted to hit – I only see a little dent.

Do you feel like the more you try, the more you fall behind. The world is such a huge place. There are so many people roaming and living life. You have it in your heart to help and give. You don’t want anyone to feel left behind.

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So, I need to look the world through our little friend we named Suzy Q. She seemed like “wow, I survived a huge fall. ” She moves one wing, “nope, not broken”. Than the other wing she checks. All is fine in our little Suzy Q’s phycial status. Little Suzy has than realizes ” wow, look at that huge tree – how will I ever be able to get up there?” She gathered all her little birdie faith and flapped those wings hard. Next thing, she is sitting in that tree looking out from the branches saying on top of her birdie lungs ” I DID IT!”

Okay – so a bird flew to the tree. Whoopie. But look at yourself. Do you have that faith Suzy had. Do you think you can spread your wings and fly? Do you know how? We know humans can’t fly but we can still use the faith of our God.

Our God carries us through life. He helps us fly free. He is the Father that has adopted you. He brought you into His family. Even if you feel alone in your family or disconnected. I know it is easy to get lost in everyday.

You are able to conquer the world. You have the power of that sword. You take it and with God’s hand on yours you banish that wall! You tear it down! And you raise your hands and twirl saying “I DID IT!” God will never let you down. He will never forsake you. He will always be there. Period!

Psalm 46:1 (KJV) God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble

I am charged now. Look at that verse! We are strong with Christ. We can look around and see that huge tree. Next thing you know – you are on the top while hanging out with our little friend Suzy Q. High Five!

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 “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

You are a Masterpiece

 

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I am approaching this blog in a new way. I am going to try to do a Bible Verse Mapping. Basically, you write the verse you want and make it your own. You will personalize the way you want on how the verse is speaking to you. If you are a person that relates for to visible study – this is a great method.

I am going to map out Ephesians 2:10 – this verse is my memory verse in my Limitless Life study with Proverbs 31.org. ( by the way – it is really fun and you learn a lot)

Ephesians 2:10

“For we are God’s masterpiece He has created us anew in Jesus Christ, so we can do all things He planned for us long ago.”

Do I feel like a masterpiece? Absolutely not – I mean – have you seen me in the morning??I mean really I am a mess! After a hot shower to wash away the sleepiness in my eyes and revive on coffee ( how many cups – you don’t want to know) Again, look in the mirror – I see wrinkles, grey hair and dark spots that Mary Kay couldn’t cover up. Yuck! We pile on a layer of makeup and here in Texas a ton of hairspray. While we are sitting in traffic, we mistakenly look into the rear view mirror. Wow, what was I thinking with that shade of lipstick?

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Us women – we have to pluck, pinch, tuck and suck in to even touch the idea of a masterpiece. We question our husbands on our appearance but we get tired of the ‘you look fine, hunnyy’ while playing candy crush on the phone. We stomp away fuming. Our self-confidence is in the toilet. We sit on the edge of our bed with the lost hope of our beauty. Who can possibility think I am a masterpiece.

 We hang our head in shame – feeling worthless. But we feel a small pull in your heart. You hear a soft whisper in your ear. That voice is saying “Daughter, you are a masterpiece. For I have made you. I sent my only Son for you to start fresh. I have wonderful plans for you. You are NOT alone”.

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In the verse I posted in the picture – You will see I changed the “WE” to “I am God’s Masterpiece” I belong to Him. He loves me the way I am. He doesn’t care about my appearance”.

God has seen you and known you since you were born. Since the minute you became a life. He has held you up and made that path of life for you. He has plans for you. You many not know what that is. I am famous for laying in my bed staring at the ceiling and asking GOD why? What am I suppose to do?

Let God mold your heart. Let Him rip those labels off. You are not a loser, you have a purpose. Let Me guide you. 

You are made like no one else on Earth. You are Gods special creation. He thinks you are the most awesome person EVER.

Let Him use that mess of yourself for the good. You will find your purpose. You will have that renew life. You will have God by your side.

Now, in the morning – jump up and run to the mirror and say – I AM A MASTERPIECE! and you will hear that small voice in your heart.

Yes, Daughter you are MY masterpiece. 

My prayer for you – is to know you are a piece of art in God’s eyes.

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