My Kids Are My Purpose Of Love
Weekends with the kids are a precious gift God has blessed me with. I don’t see them as much as I would like. Due to our visitations schudules and how much I work during the week – I find a size of a needle to squeeze them in. It isn’t enough for me. When they are not with me – I feel like a piece of me is missing. When they are with me.. they show so much love to me. Natalie always wants me to be cuddling with her – holding her hand – she is my lil me. We are getting closer. I don’t want to loose that connection with my daughter. I want her to know how much I love her.
Nicholas is my sweet loving boy. He just randomly runs in the room to give me a kiss. He always wants to be around mommy. He has a lot of love in him. He will be turning 7 this coming month. He is very excited about it. He went to toyrus and made a wish list with 64 items.
I am at the point in my life now where I can afford to take them out and do stuff with them. We went to the movies today to see Men In Black.
It is fun doing things with the kids. I know they will remember little things with mommy. We always try to have fun. We had a great weekend of swimming and walking to feed ducks. We got a little sun.. but it makes them look healthy since my son is a ghost. But we had a great weekend.
The bad part of this.. when I drop them off – I do into instant depression. I know I am providing as much as I can with my kids. I am not a full time mommy like I was. Which is a shift for me since I was home with them until they went to school. I raised them since they were babies. Now that they are getting bigger – I feel like I miss on a lot of them. I will be working on a new job idea where it won’t take all the time away from them. I have a plan for the next year that will make us closer. I know God is putting me through this so I can learn to be strong. But during that path of becoming strong – you break a lot.
I just want my kids to grow up knowing how much mommy loves them and I am always here for them no matter what.
Time will show the love I have for them through the years. This is just a glitch for me to overcome some obstacles I have know in life……