Weekend of fun in the sun.. and heart break

My Kids Are My Purpose Of Love

Weekends with the kids are a precious gift God has blessed me with. I don’t see them as much as I would like. Due to our visitations schudules and how much I work during the week – I find a size of a needle to squeeze them in. It isn’t enough for me. When they are not with me – I feel like  a piece of me is missing. When they are with me.. they show so much love to me. Natalie always wants me to be cuddling with her – holding her hand – she is my lil me. We are getting closer. I don’t want to loose that connection with my daughter. I want her to know how much I love her.

Natalie’s baby motto: Our lil squishy forever

Nicholas is my sweet loving boy. He just randomly runs in the room to give me a kiss. He always wants to be around mommy. He has a lot of love in him. He will be turning 7 this coming month. He is very excited about it. He went to toyrus and made a wish list with 64 items.

Nicholas obsession with lego’s and military.. he always plays with these.. he makes a full movie out of the toys.

I am at the point in my life now where I can afford to take them out and do stuff with them. We went to the movies today to see Men In Black.

Fun in the sun

It is fun doing things with the kids. I know they will remember little things with mommy. We always try to have fun. We had a great weekend of swimming and walking to feed ducks. We got a little sun.. but it makes them look healthy since my son is a ghost. But we had a great weekend.

The bad part of this.. when I drop them off – I do into instant depression. I know I am providing as much as I can with my kids. I am not a full time mommy like I was. Which is a shift for me since I was home with them until they went to school. I raised them since they were babies. Now that they are getting bigger – I feel like I miss on a lot of them. I will be working on a new job idea where it won’t take all the time away from them. I have a plan for the next year that will make us closer. I know God is putting me through this so I can learn to be strong. But during that path of becoming strong – you break a lot.

I just want my kids to grow up knowing how much mommy loves them and I am always here for them no matter what.

Time will show the love I have for them through the years. This is just a glitch for me to overcome some obstacles I have know in life……


One thought on “Weekend of fun in the sun.. and heart break

  1. If I have learned anything time is about quality and not quantity. Make the most out of the time you do have, look forward to the next time you will see your babies. Tell and show them that you love them every chance you get. Breath…everything will be ok. 🙂

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